On High Finance

I totally kept a few 1st Editions.
Gotta plan for my retirement, right?

It makes me sad that it's fiscally less responsible of me to go to work for the day than to drive to the mall and sell someone a binder full of early Pokémon cards.

I'd describe this feeling as being akin to flipping a house you've put a decade of work into. Yeah, you're taking a huge financial loss, but it's been so long that you'd thought all that money wasted in the first place.

Or selling any type of collectible, I guess. Anyway, the moral of the week is "thank god for nostalgic nerds."

Fun with Fetuses

Someone posted a sonogram to facebook the other day. I hope she's really happy. I'm a little sad, though. She's trading possibility and a killer beach bod for a tiny, incapable monster that won't appreciate her for 30 years.

Mostly, I'm just skeeved out by pregnancy. I mean look at this thing:

I know you're supposed to look at that T.V. static peanut and see a baby like so:

But all I see is this:

I'm pretty sure I've seen that Pokémon before. I'm also pretty sure it burst out of Kane's chest in Ridley Scott's Alien.

Pregnancy is terrifying.

On Pokémon

A few weeks ago I noticed my brothers playing the latest Pokémon game. Black version. I find it incredible that after we minimized Gameboy game cartridges into SD cards, we blew up the size of their cases to compensate. I flipped through the booklet marveling at how walking helps your pokémon grow, how the "bad guys" are actually animal rights activists who believe it is wrong to engage in glorified cockfighting and "liberate" your pokémon by–yes–fighting you with their own pokémon. Oh yeah, and for like the fourth iteration, it's actually impossible to "Catch 'em all." Nothing like making a game that completely invalidates your own slogan. Classy.

I also noticed this little gem of bilingual, Canada-friendly logo:

Hell yeah. Pokémon Noire? I'd absolutely buy a new Gameboy to play a noir version of Pokémon. All gritty and black & white? Ash chain smoking for two hours, Brock as a seedy burlesque owner with a penchant for the waitresses who have a nasty habit of turning up dead? Misty the slinky nightclub singer? May (Mai?) as Ash's sexy but clumsy secretary (who you know he should really be with)? Pikachu's bloodstained outline on the floor?

My god, it'd be beautiful.


I was totally going to draw that myself, but it failed on so many levels so spectacularly.