Come On, Irene

Thanks to a Photoshop crash and having to restart my Mac (shows you how seriously I fucked with PS), this took a little longer than expected, but allowed me to actually get it done way faster the second time, thanks to having abetter game plan. I'm actually surprisingly happy with this.

Note: After Dexy's became a one-hit wonder, Irene went on to inspire Flock Of Seagulls to try a new haircut for which they became famous.

On Cabin Fever

I got through this whole post without making one
Rider Strong joke. I should win a date with Topanga.
…Damn it.

I haven't gotten into work for a week now. No, I've not been barricaded in behind steel doors fending off dreaded ice zombies of the snowpocalypse. It just keeps snowing the night before all the days I'm scheduled to work. Store's not open, I can't go in.

I've filled my time fairly well. I worked on my book, I took notes whenever a new episode of Jersey Shore was on, I even got out to the grocery store a couple times and saw friends before the weather got too rough. But I went into this most recent snow storm basically being done. I finished everything. Now I've got very little that needs doing and precious little that I'd be interested in doing after spending the last week indoors.

Of course, most of my friends are stuck driving into work anyway at the crack of dawn and sitting around doing nothing all day, so I suppose sleeping in and only being bothered by too much free time isn't all that bad. In fact, it kind of makes me the asshole of the group. Awesome.

On Snow Drifts

I know I've said it before, but it bares saying again: through sheer repetition of low-grade accidents and bonehead maneuvers, my friends are exactly the kind of guys you want around when something goes wrong.

Last night we went out for a drive to kill some time before appetizers/drink specials kicked in at our local family restaurant. And–obviously–we skidded off the road into a snow drift. Honestly? It wasn't even that bad. We'd all done it before. We knew the powder was soft, so there was no body damage to the car. We knew to call AAA after we failed to immediately rock/push ourselves out. We even knew to "appropriate" a shovel from the yard of a darkened house to help dig ourselves out.

Honestly, the only thing we didn't seem to know was "Let the gorgeous girl driving by help us out when she offers. Maybe her 'friend' up the road is cute too." But even that screw-up didn't throw us off too badly. Within 45 minutes we had ourselves out and back on the road, made it to the restaurant realizing none of our other friends ever showed up, and then ordered some beers and food to fill our deserving stomachs.

Really, all minor disasters should end so well. 75% of Australia's Queensland is a disaster zone right now, but you can bet they're going to throw a hell of a Foster's and BBQ shindig after. Oh my god, I think my friends and I are secretly Australian. I never knew.

Baby It's Cold Outside

Weather reports predict a huge storm for today. 6"-10" of snow, all day long, into early tomorrow, grandma sleeping over to avoid her horrible slanty driveway and everything.

You know in movies–I really want to say movies but I think "jewelry store commercials" is more accurate–where a cute, early-thirties upper-middle class white couple is cuddling on the couch through a bad storm, snuggled up under a blanket with thick sweaters and a fire and an assortment of good books and fine tea/cocoa/red wine?

That's my plan for today. Except I'll be relatively poor and I'll be cuddling myself, in the least euphemistic way possible. (Hey, my grandma will be here. Jeeze.)

On Preparedness

My town apparently calls your house with "CODE RED" on the caller ID when a big snow storm is coming.

For the record, "CODE RED" is not telling me the Russians are invading.

They are not telling me there is an intruder alert or to get to my ready station in the transporter bay, or even that I should be drinking more gamer-aimed Mountain Dew.

I was being told not to put out any paper recycling, in case service was canceled in the morning.


I feel so much safer.

On the Weather

I love that everybody in my town pretty much spent yesterday giving the weathermen shit for not being able to decide if we were getting 2-4 inches of snow or 3-6, or tell us if it was starting at noon or three.

Mostly because they spent all day today bitching about the HORRIBLE SNOW stalling out and not starting until late. I guess they were lamenting all the extra shopping they could have maybe possibly tried to do in between everyone else driving to do the same thing.

Now they're telling us 12-18" because the storm's moving so slowly.

And there's like 2-4 inches in total. Marvelous.