On Lacking Direction: A Project Update

So today I get to sleep in a little bit, then book it to Connecticut for an interview with Apple. That'd be a second part-time job alongside Barnes & Noble, both of which would fund my plot to move somewhere more conducive to a writing career in the near future.

All this while maintaining this blog, submitting my book proposal to more agents, and interviewing webcartoonists from Oregon, Texas, Belgium and hopefully Massachusetts for said book.

Oh, and I'm starting a secret project to create a meme/internet resource site, but shush.

Basically, I have no idea what I'm doing, but it should be very entertaining for the rest of you, especially with a 1000th blog post coming in about a month. (Oh shit oh shit oh shit….) Bear with me while my head explodes, and sell the elegant blood splatter pattern afterward.

On Leggings

Sometimes I come up with a really funny idea and in searching for more information on the topic, find someone's already made the joke I was going to use. Often not as well. Sometimes better. I'm not really sure which feels worse.

But sometimes I come across something and all I get is that terrible feeling that someone far more observant and more eminently qualified has made a joke I should have, far more powerfully than I ever could, and I don't even realize it until I've read it.

This is one of those things:














UIUC - No Pants


Considering how long I spent with part-time jobs in clothing retail, I can't believe I never noticed this.

Girls are walking around with no pants on.

I mean I kind of get it. Leggings are like thick stockings. You can wear them under skirts or even shorts or with a tutu. Whatever.

And sure, they were popular without other bottoms back in the '80s, but has "Well, it was popular in the '80s," ever panned out as a good reason to do something? Phil Collins was popular in the '80s. Giving money to the Taliban was popular in the '80s.

Personally, I blame yoga pants. Those things just kept getting thinner and tighter and, believe me, I won't complain unless you're the type of person ill-suited towards tight clothing, but at some point we passed the point where Western society has typically drawn the line between garment and undergarment.

What does this change? Absolutely nothing.

But next time you're walking down the street and you see an attractive girl wearing only leggings from the waist down, just remember this: she's not wearing any pants.

Just remember that and try to take her seriously. Try to take America seriously.