Pajama Jeans: Like Jeggings, Except for Breathing

 

 

Yup, that's Pajama Jeans. Nope, not "jeggings," these are pajama jeans.

The difference is apparently in that it's "DormiSoft" fabric, a "proprietary blend of cotton and spandex," whereas jeggings would either be all cotton and dyed to look like jeans or some different combination of cotton denim and stretchy things.

I think the real difference is jeggings are way more passable and "highish" fashion. They might, from a great distance, be mistaken for actual jeans. Of course they might also be mistaken for body paint.

 No, these seem more like sweat pants or yoga pants that might, even from a grand distance, be mistaken for really really shitty jeans.

Plus, these aren't skin tight after the butt. That way no one will notice your horribly misshapen tree stumps. So there's that.

Ooh! And if you act "now," they'll send you a free heather gray cotton crew-neck babydoll tee. It's starting to look exactly like a trip down to Old Navy.

On Leggings

Sometimes I come up with a really funny idea and in searching for more information on the topic, find someone's already made the joke I was going to use. Often not as well. Sometimes better. I'm not really sure which feels worse.

But sometimes I come across something and all I get is that terrible feeling that someone far more observant and more eminently qualified has made a joke I should have, far more powerfully than I ever could, and I don't even realize it until I've read it.

This is one of those things:














UIUC - No Pants


Considering how long I spent with part-time jobs in clothing retail, I can't believe I never noticed this.

Girls are walking around with no pants on.

I mean I kind of get it. Leggings are like thick stockings. You can wear them under skirts or even shorts or with a tutu. Whatever.

And sure, they were popular without other bottoms back in the '80s, but has "Well, it was popular in the '80s," ever panned out as a good reason to do something? Phil Collins was popular in the '80s. Giving money to the Taliban was popular in the '80s.

Personally, I blame yoga pants. Those things just kept getting thinner and tighter and, believe me, I won't complain unless you're the type of person ill-suited towards tight clothing, but at some point we passed the point where Western society has typically drawn the line between garment and undergarment.

What does this change? Absolutely nothing.

But next time you're walking down the street and you see an attractive girl wearing only leggings from the waist down, just remember this: she's not wearing any pants.

Just remember that and try to take her seriously. Try to take America seriously.