Thursday, October 28, 2010

On The Gark

"Yeah, mah nigga, it's all abouts the chedder biscuits."
For whatever reason, our father took to calling my little brother "The Gark." He claims it was, "Because you were going to be a football player." I can understand this. "Gark" certainly is a large, lumbering sound. Still, William "The Refrigerator" Perry it ain't. So what the hell is a gark?

A simple Google search for "The Gark" returns a top result for the "G.A.R.K. , The Greater Alabama Rottweiler Klub." I don't know about you, but I'm wary of joining any organization based out of Atlanta that has a penchant for Rottweilers and extraneous use of the letter K.

Perhaps Ye Olde Urban Dictionary might help us out:

"Gark3 - An onomatopoeia meant to represent the noise a female (or perhaps a male) makes during the act of fellatio and takes in more than they can handle."

Usage examples include:

"Male: 'Baby if you keep sucking me like that I'm gonna take you to Red Lobster for cheddar biscuits'

The first two definitions claim gark is a filler word and inherently meaningless. I choose to believe the truth that is more interesting.

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