Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Giant Penis Teaches Kids About Farm Animals | Totally not bestiality

There is a children's book. It is called "Willy Goes to the Farm." On like a class trip, or something.

"Willy" is a giant, anthropomorphized worm in a baseball hat. He is pink and tubular, though poorly illustrated. He also has a big bulbous head–because so do children–and a large, darker pink mouth-hole which is frequently open because he likes to smile, though Willy has no teeth. Oh, and he has back ridges. You know what? Words begin to fail.

This is Willy:



Yep, that's a giant scraggly penis, alright.

Stacy Ann Beitler is, apparently, a rather well-respected children's author, though clearly she has no graphic design training and–I'd imagine–completely lacks any supplies more advanced than an 8-pack of Crayola colored pencils.

… A likely story.

"Stacey Ann Beitler" must be a clever pseudonym for one "Stan Nacey Litbeer," prolific gonzo journalist of the 1970s, run afoul of animal rights activists in '78 for his liberal stances on interspecies erotica and sexual education in grade school.*


*I'm sure Stacey Ann Beitler is a real person, and probably a perfectly wonderful woman.

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