Friday, October 16, 2009

On The Cash Cab

I think I'm going to try and sign up to be on Cash Cab, the only game show that takes place right [t]here in [Ben Bailey's] taxi.

I'll be completely honest. I think I'm smarter than most of their contestants. I won't even try to be modest about how much smarter I think I am. I am significantly more inundated with "general knowledge" and bizarre trivia than easily 70% of the people getting rides around NYC on national television. Additionally, I have much smarter friends on speed dial who have very different fields of interest and professions.

In short, I could rack up a small fortune driving around town. I have a plan of action.

Phase 1: Preliminary Work
  • Sign up for show. I know that sounds simple, but the people on Cash Cab sign up to be possible contestants on unknown game shows and are informed approximately when they will participate. That's why very few people seem surprised to see those giant disco lights and a bald giant doing silly voices.

Phase 2: Go Into The City
  • We have plenty of reasons to do this. Go at night to get double prize money.

Phase 3: Strategization, Bitchez!
  • Ideally I would be bringing my friends Jay, Dean and Mike. With me this gives us a broad range of History, Science, Sports, Film, Music, and Pop Culture knowledge.
  • Mobile shout-outs should be finalized on-site, but our default should be our friend Matt who is a borderline genius and now lives in Canada, making him extra cool and nice to everyone.
  • Street shout-outs should be avoided, but if necessary passersby should be selected based on whether or not they look like they know the genre of the question. Consider this trivial profiling.
  • Be careful of the earliest questions. Rack up $200 early and you stand a better shot of getting a Red Light Challenge and $200 extra.
  • Similarly, being careful of early questions reduces the risk of multiple early strikes.
  • Stretch inter-question banter with Ben if you have 2 strikes. Let him be the funny one while you approach your destination.
  • Walk away with the money. As Jay's poker-loving father has always said, "Once it's in front of you it's money in your pocket." Take the money. Unless you have won almost no money (when divided amongst the number of your group), there is no sense in trying for the Video Bonus Question, because it's never as easy as you really want.
  • Try not to look like a douche on camera.
That last part is tricky for me.

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