Drunken Master and Other Failed Kung-Fu Prodigies and Their Finishing Moves

• Drunken Master - Profuse Vomiting
• Heroin Master - The Shakes
• Weed Master - Sit On the Couch Watching Food Network
• LSD Master - Trip Balls
• Rohypnol Adept - I Forget
• MDMA Master - Rub Up Against Things
  
• Cocaine Sensei - JesusfuckingChristhithiminthefacealreadywhydontchacomeonjustdoitgoddamnitmoveoverIlldoitmyselfheremove!
• The Crystal Meth Monk - Steal Your T.V.