Saturday, June 12, 2010

On FIFA & World Cup Soccer

Thoughts on the World Cup, Soccer, and Football in General:
  • I never knew "My Country 'tis of Thee" stole its melody from "God Save the Queen."
  • Asking whether the U.S. or England is the 'white' team feels like if I get it wrong someone is going to steal my land.
  • Everything Americans hate about futból–i.e. low scoring, simple rules–is the exact opposite of what is wrong with basketball.
  • We were pretty big douches to name another sport "football" despite a dearth of kicking. Did we just say, "Nope, we're using that. Sorry?"
  • Apparently when a team wins the World Cup, they get a gold-plated replica, but FIFA keeps the actual cup, which some dude says can't possibly be solid gold like they say. Baller.
  • Every promo commercial sounds like it was narrated by Morgan Freeman.
  • When the British announcer said "Bocanegra" it does not sound like "Bocanegra."
  • Ties are stupid, but I'll take it over losing.

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