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"They sent me home from school because I keep sticking my hand down there!"
Back before the age of GPS and MapQuest, my mother had a simple rule for giving a driver directions: "Right" exclusively means the opposite of "left;" use "correct" or "yes" for an affirmative.
"So I make a left up here?"
"Right."
"Right?"
"Right, left."
"Right, then left?"
"No, just left."
"That's what I said!"
"Right."
I learned a new trick, recently. Apparently, when you see a deer in the road you're not supposed to yell out, "Deer," because some people will just think you love them and are trying to start a conversation by calling them "dear." What fools.
How should you inform your driver that there is a large, impala in the middle of the road (the quadrupedal kind, not the Chevy)?
You say, "Bambi."
Then they'll just think there's an aging stripper in their headlights.
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