Wednesday, December 9, 2009

On Anal Sex


This blog post contains graphic material not suitable for my mother or any of yours either.

I'll let people save face, but someone reiterated a movie line that the most romantic thing a girl can do is legitimately enjoy anal sex simply because her guy likes it. It's the idea of getting off on you getting off. Sweet, really.

However this same person – and everyone in the room, really – also admitted that this has never been discovered to be the case in real-world applications of sexy times.

One guy said that there seems to be this ill-defined line that's not okay to cross. You can be down there doing your thing and diddle your finger around a bit and she loves it, but graze your junk across something during basic field maneuvers and BAM! She's all "WHOA THERE, SAILOR, WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU'RE GOING?"

To put it bluntly, this is the same type of girl who calls the police because she saw two black guys in an old Chavel driving all slow through her neighborhood.

I mean, yeah, okay, it's a little weird, but those guys have every right to just be hanging around out back as long as they don't try to bust in your backdoor and fuck shit up.

Maybe they're just passing through and stopped for a look around. Nothing wrong with that, with just looking. Maybe one day you could stop and actually talk to them, see how they're doing. Maybe even invite them in and see where things go. They could be really nice guys, after all. Who knows? God, maybe you'd actually enjoy their company if you weren't such a bigoted bitch all the time. Gosh.

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